If you know me, you are aware of my love for the short story, 100% Perfect Girl by Haruki Murakami. Actually, you are probably aware of my love for Murakami and his writing, in general. If you haven’t read it, and are at all interested in what really moves me, you should go read it now (I promise it’s just a story, no ad). Won’t take long (it’s short) and I’m pretty sure you’ll be thinking for a while afterwards. If not, then you’re probably just a piece of wood. Which is fine, I’m okay with that too. Just come back and read my blog when you’re done. For God’s sake though, don’t tell me you don’t like to “read”. 1
Are you back? Okay…
For years, I focused a lot on the carpe diem, or as they say these days the YOLO, of the story. Meaning, we should jump when we should jump and we should make sure we seize the opportunities that are before us while they are before us. Otherwise just go ahead and die wishing you had. Because you never quite know when someone’s going to get sick and come down with amnesia and forget that you were the 100% perfect girl or guy for them. It could happen. And then you live and die like everyone else, always wondering, never really getting there. Wherever your there is.
Lately however, I’ve been reminded of how years ago, somewhere between the birth of my daughter and figuring out I’d be dating again, I decided I needed to work on me.
After a couple dating experiences that didn’t make it, I realized I needed to work on myself and try to become so amazing that I could have anyone I wanted. And also never again wonder when something didn’t work out, if only I had _____, if only I were ____ . Maybe then I would find the person that was right for me.
For me, this involved education, it involved my physical appearance, it involved becoming a more intelligent and aware person, it meant becoming a strong and independent woman that people admired, it meant saying shit out loud that I never would have before. I waited a long time to cuss out loud, by the way. So sometimes, that’s part of it too. 2
Everyone Should Strive to be at Least a 5
My friend and I discussed becoming the sort of person our ideal date would want. We forget about that sometimes and instead focus on what we want and finding this person that meets our standards and matches our idea of perfect. But, in order for that to completely work out, we also have to be the 100% Perfect Girl or Guy for them as well. If we have a person that we measure everyone else by, are we measuring ourselves by the same standards? You can’t be a 2 and expect to get a 10, you’ll spend a lot of time and energy on rolling with a square wheel. It isn’t entirely impossible, it’s just a lot more difficult.
There Will Never Be Another You
A co worker told me that our supervisor mentioned after I left the job that “there will never be another Christina”. Those words became part of the working on me plan. We all know there will never be another you, but when you are gone, will people recognize that?
I am still working on me and likely will be for a long time. 3 In the end, I will expect amazing from you but you will be able to expect amazing from me as well.
Are you the 100% perfect person for your 100% perfect person? Where are you on the scale you measure others by?
All over your inbox
- Cari Wegner on Why Friends With Benefits Is Bullshit
- Hugh Liddle on Why Friends With Benefits Is Bullshit
- Christina Majaski on Stupid List Friday: 5 Types of Old People You Can Probably Punch
- Gofuckyourselfoldwoman on Stupid List Friday: 5 Types of Old People You Can Probably Punch
- damnstraightchristina on Stupid List Friday: 5 Types of Old People You Can Probably Punch